All The Leaves Are Falling Down

As regular readers (if any are left!) will have noticed, my blogging has trailed off dramatically the past couple of years and has become practically non-existent since this May.

I know why.

I’ve been embracing ‘real life’ more and not wanting to sit down in front of my laptop and blog. This makes me happy but it also makes me sad because I’ve missed capturing some amazing moments of my life on my blog such as my 40^th birthday party last October (that post still remains half complete) and our whole month spent in Florida this year.

I’m at a crossroads and I don’t know what to do.

Time is precious and I want to stop it.

Right now!

MC and TC are both 6 and 3 years old now. I started this blog as a place to record my life as a stay-at-home mum and to document their early adventures so they had a place to read about it when I was older.

I feel like I’ve failed.

Although I have to admit, I have been keeping a little finger in the blogging pie, as it were, by writing some blog posts for Muddy Puddles who provide the most amazing children’s waterproofs and outdoor clothing. I love being a ‘Muddy Parent’. Not only does it mean we get sent a few items from the team, it encourages to become more outdoorsy – something which I openly admit we can fail at sometimes after a hard week. It also means that keeping myself in with blogging may encourage me to return properly.

Watch this space!

Anyway, we’ve explored more places around where we live and realised just how pretty awesome it is. The summer came and went in a flurry of outdoor adventures and then something big happened.

TC started nursery at his big sisters school this September.

With him only turning 3 in March, he seems so little in his uniform. His first day he was super excited and happy but the nerves kicked in when he got into class. Our daughter was allowed to go into his class to try and reassure him – it’s such a big deal for such small children.

Both the kids are well equipped for school with their coats from Muddy Puddles. What’s great is they have a dedicated section on their website for all your school needs. We love the ‘Originals Jacket’, which comes in 5 different colours, as it’s completely waterproof but so lightweight. Absolutely perfect for this time of year.

After a first week of a few of tears he has settled in great and is really starting to come out of himself. He chats our heads off at home and around people he knows but he can clam up in social environments. He had been going to playgroup four mornings a week up until July and not once did they hear him say one word!

I have to admit I was worried about him. He is a total mummy’s boy. The fact he didn’t speak at playgroup was a concern but I think, looking back, that we put pressure on him to speak which made the situation worse for him. We’ve since changed our tactics and ignored his lack of speech in these environments and just encouraged him more when he did speak in situations where he was anxious.

As the weather starts to turn noticeably cooler they are exploring Autumn at school and my usually quiet boy has suddenly taken to singing this little song he learnt at school…

All the leaves are falling down
Orange, yellow, red and brown

When I picked him up last week he was sporting a special “Super star” sticker and his teacher told me he’d actually sung in class. I was so happy! I finally think my little shy boy is realising he can get so much more out of things when he just lets himself go.

After school we went on a lovely walk in the Autumn sunshine and looked at the changing colours of the leaves. October really is a beautiful month to be out and about. Although it’s been unusually warm there is that freshness in the air that only the shoulder months can bring.

As we walked, we sang. I felt a lump in my throat.

All the leaves are falling down
Orange, yellow, red and brown

I feel like my little leaf is branching off on his own and I couldn’t be more proud.

I am proud to be part of the Muddy Puddles Muddy Parent team.

I am sent a small number of items but never receive any cash incentive.

All photographs, words, views and opinions are entirely my own.

 

#MeAndMine - A Family Portrait (March 2015)

Phew! March has been a hectic month.

It always is.

I have both children's birthdays falling within 17 days of each other in March. It means planning birthday days and planning parties that just takes up a lot of my time.

We've also been stepping up the Orlando holiday planning and have, today, told the kids the secret that we've been keeping for a year - we are taking them back to our 'second home'. The excitement in our house is building to fever point...and that's just Matt and I!

In amongst the excitement Matt and I have been consuming Breaking Bad episodes like they are, literally, drugs. It was something we never even looked at when it originally aired and so it's been great to just watch them all. One night we watched 3 back to back! As of today we are 4 episodes away from the very end of the last season - tense and exciting is an understatement. Part of me is wanting it to be over though so I get my evenings back. I don't think I've been so into a television series since Game Of Thrones...and that starts again soon. Argh!

Sorry, I'm digressing. My photo...

Back on March 11th it was MC's 6th birthday and she chose Pizza Express as her birthday restaurant. We had a lovely meal and, as always, the children were impeccably behaved. I guess it comes from eating out a lot but they are always great in restaurants. So, I asked the Manager to take a family photo of us. It turned out quite nice.

Here's to another month passing and getting closer to our amazing holiday!

Three Is The Magic Number - Happy Birthday TC

I can't believe TC is 3 years old today.

The days, weeks, months and now YEARS are going by in a blur.

Where is the time going?

His birthdays are always a little bittersweet as I can't help but think about Matilda Mae and how it should be her 3rd birthday a matter of weeks later. Today has been quite emotional because I always look at 3 as being such a big milestone in the life of a child.

They seem to grow so much between 3 and 4. This September he'll be starting in Nursery at MC's school.

I'm so proud of my baby boy. I waited a long time to start potty training with him, much longer than MC but he picked it up straight away so that's all sorted.

He is thriving more at Playschool too and, after Easter, he will be upping his mornings in readiness for September.

I know he's growing up so fast but he'll always be my baby boy.

28th March 2012

28th March 2013

28th March 2014

28th March 2015

Three really is the magic number.

Happy 3rd Birthday baby boy.

Love you always xx

#MeAndMine - A Family Portrait (February 2015)

I find myself saying the same thing at the end of each month over the last 6 months or so.

"Where has the month gone?"

This month is no exception.

I wish I had a pause button sometimes as there just aren't enough hours in the day.

Now we are coming into March which is the month of both MC and TC's birthdays (6 and 3 respectively) so that will be busy. It's my Mum's 70 in April and then May we are off to Orlando again! I have so much to organise it's untrue.

February has seen us on short breaks away twice. The first, just Matt and I to York to celebrate 11 years of love and happiness together and we've also went away with Matt's parents for 3 nights to Center Parcs at the beginning of the half-term school holidays.

We'd never been away with them before and we'd also never been to Center Parcs. If I am totally honest, neither Matt nor I were really looking forward to the weekend. We were worried for various reasons and one being we didn't think we would like Center Parcs. We didn't think it was 'our thing'.

I'm pleased to report that we were both pleasantly surprised by Center Parcs. We went to Whinfell Forest in Cumbria and it was lovely. Our lodge was immaculate and had it's own private jetty onto the lake and everyday we had an abundance of wildlife on our patio - it was like being in a Disney movie! The children had a lovely time with their Grandparents who they don't see as often as my parents who live a few miles away and Matt and I got lots of time to ourselves again. Would I go back? The jury is still out on that one. If we did I think it would definitely have to be in term-time because the price Center Parcs charge in the school holidays is outrageous!

My mother-in-law took our Me And Mine photographs this weekend and her photographs are usually terrible she isn't known for her photography skills but she did me proud.

Oh and yes, I've gone back blonde again...

#MeAndMine - A Family Portrait (November 2014)

I can't believe it's December tomorrow!

Where is 2014 going?

Life just doesn't seem to get any quieter. I thought I'd have more time to blog with TC starting to go to Play School a couple of times a week now but I don't. I'm desperately wanting to blog about my huge 80's themed 40th Birthday party but haven't gotten to that yet.  I have so much to do before Christmas and I don't know how I'm going to fit it all in.

Last time I blogged was about TC struggling to settle in to Play School but thankfully that all seems to be working out well now. He goes in without fuss now. I know he'd prefer to be at home or out with Mummy but he reluctantly accepts his time there and talks about all the fun he's had when I pick him up. I've noticed he's becoming more confident and less reliant on my apron strings so it's all a step in the right direction.

I was busy this month organising a charity event for The Lullaby Trust in memory of Matilda Mae. That consumed the vast majority of my time and, with the help of a few fellow bloggers, we managed to raise over £550 which will be doubled to over £1100 for the charity - it's more than I could've hoped for.

I between all the other stuff I've been doing I'm taking the children to private swimming lessons now. TC on a Wednesday and MC on a Saturday. The other Saturday we all decided to go and watch MC but we arrived early. Now, I'm always messing around with selfies of the children so I thought it would be nice to take some of us all. It wasn't my attention to use them for my Me and Mine post - they were for my '23 Snaps' app on my phone where I just share photos of the children with immediate family - but the series I took has made me laugh so much that I want to document them.

MC is a little madam and always like to be the centre of the shot…often to the detriment of her little brother…

Poor TC!

Mummy's Boy! My fault?

Tiny Ched is my youngest.

My boy.

My baby.

My last.

Maybe it's my fault he's the way he is?

Maybe because I know I'm not having any more babies I've somehow made him more clingy.

He's a mummy's boy through and through.

"Want mummy to dress me!"

"Want Mummy to come!"

"Want Mummy to sit there!"

"Want mummy!"

"WANT MUMMY!"

"WANT MUMMY!"

It's both lovely and exhausting in equal measures.

Maybe it's a boy thing?

Maybe they are more dependent on their mothers?

MC was never like this.

Sure, she used to want me a lot but she was never this bad. She certainly never used to have to be physically peeled off me at the doorstep of play school.

Yes, TC has started going to play school. The same one that MC attended a few years back. The same women run it and I know how great it is there. The gender split is somewhat skewed there though.

"I think there was a 'boy boom' around here two years ago" they said to me as they signed him up before half term. "We have 18 children and only 4 of them are girls".

I think this could be where some of the problem lies. I'm not sure. TC is used to more female biased company. He spends a considerable amount of time with me and with MC. Also, he's certainly never been thrust into a situation where he's surrounded by 13 other boys - a couple of them boisterous at that.

Yesterday was only his 4th time at play school and I realise it's very early days but it was a particularly heart wrenching morning at the drop off. He started before we've even got out of the house...

"Don't want to go play school!"

Refusal to put his shoes and coat on.

"Want mummy come!"

Refusal to get in the car.

"Want mummy come to play school!"

Outside the gate he's sobbing. Not screaming or kicking. Just loud heart wrenching sobs and tugging at me to walk him away from the door.

The door opens.

The delivery of my boy is quick.

Like ripping a plaster off.

"It's the best way" they tell me.

As he's peeled from my arms he turns to me. Snot and tears fill his tiny face and he shouts "MUMMY!" with a look of terror one last time before they take him inside and I walk away.

I keep walking to the car.

I don't look back.

Snot and tears begin to fill my face.

I feel like the worst mother in the world.

I remember MC had a few wobbly moments. Half an hour later I would get a text message from play school to say she was fine. Sometimes they'd even send me a photo of her playing happily.

Not this time though.

They never text me about TC.

Because they know, and I know, he's not fine.

Through each session he doesn't want to join in. He doesn't want to play. He doesn't want to listen to stories. He doesn't want to have a drink or snack. He just stands there completely out of his depth silently sobbing occasionally.

Maybe it's my fault?

Maybe it is something I've done as a stay-at-home mum?

Maybe it's just a phase?

Maybe he'll grow out of it?

I really don't know.

What I do know though, is that having a mummy's boy is messing with my heart. On the one hand I want him to be independent but on the other I love the fact he wants me and I never want to let him go.

My boy.

My baby.

My last.

#MeAndMine - A Family Portrait (September 2014)

September has been a busy month. 

Really busy.

It's been a month of birthdays, nights out, days out, meals out and general madness. I feel like I haven't even got time to break wind right now. I'm also on countdown as I'm turning 40 in less than 2 weeks! Eep! I'm going to be revamping the look of my blog to coincide with my birthday too and I have some very special photographs to share. I am really determined to find the time to blog properly again.

Anyway, back to this past past month...

Matt and I have weirdly become closer than I ever imagined over this past month. We've always been incredibly close - we share everything - but this, this closeness is amazing and something I wish I could bottle and sell to every single couple I know right now. We are so thankful for a lot of things too. We have two happy, healthy and beautiful children. We have amazing family and friends and our house move last June was the best move we have ever made. We love our new house and have made some fantastic new friends from our neighbours. We are off for a third trip to Walt Disney World with the children next year and my parents are joining us for part of it too. I could go on.

We've lived in this area together for over 10 years now (I've lived here all my life). We are a stones throw from beautiful countryside, amazing cities and lovely beaches. We have the perfect mix of what we need at this time of our lives. We are also very close to Chester Zoo.

Because of this we have a membership which means we can go along anytime we like. Sometimes we will just go for an hour so the children can visit some of their favourite animals and play on the play ark for a while. We love Chester Zoo and I've written about it before we had a membership. 

What makes it so special now is that we have been watching the new BBC drama 'Our Zoo' which is based on the true story of the Mottershead family who founded the zoo in the 1930's. The series documents their fight to make Chester Zoo work, despite huge opposition from the locals of the village of Upton.

It's fascinating watching the history of a place I love and have known all my life. I was born just down the road from Chester Zoo too so it makes it even more special.

The only bad thing (for us) is that, since the series has aired, Chester Zoo seems to be a lot busier than it used to be. This is a great thing for the animals and conservation work they do though and I'm so pleased the series is such a huge hit. Thankfully, even when it's busy it's still a superb day out. If you haven't been then you should make sure you manage to visit. I may see you there!

I've been to Chester Zoo a couple of times this month with TC and friends but we went there as a family on Matt's birthday weekend. It was perfect weather - not too hot or cold - and there were plenty of animals to see and fun to be had. MC wanted to go on the monorail as she'd never been on it before. I decided that this was to be the setting of our family photo for this month.

Matt decided to yawn on the first take.

Then TC shut his eyes on the second.

But I didn't bother taking a third photo as both of these were enough. They show us as happy and together and that, for me, is the perfect photo.

This post is not a sponsored post

I wasn't asked to promote Chester Zoo or Our Zoo -

I just love them both

#MeAndMine - A Family Portrait (August 2014)

I don't know where the summer holidays have gone. MC goes back to school on Wednesday and I'll miss her so much.

I'm not saying that every day has been a blissfully perfect day. There have been times when the two children have driven me mad but, on the whole, they have been lovely and seeing their relationship blossom each day is wonderful.

The days have flown and I haven't actually blogged since last months Me and Mine! I have barely had any time at all and have just been enjoying days with the kids and evenings with Matt.

In amongst seeing friends, going for picnics, going on adventures, having lazy days in the park we've also had a fair few weekends of family time as a foursome. It's been lovely.  Matt works so hard to provide financial stability for me and the children so our weekends are very precious.

Before the weather turned in August we spent the day at Gulliver's World in Warrington. We'd never been before and it's only a half hour drive for us. We had a lovely fun-filled day. It's not the greatest of theme parks - it needs a lot of TLC but the kids loved it which was all we needed to see. We enjoyed taking some selfies on rides too.

Then, last week, Matt took the day off work as we had tickets booked to see Peppa Pig Live in Llandudno. It was TC's first trip to the theatre and, considering he's only 2, he coped quite well. He got tired and naggy in the second half so Matt took him to the car for the last 15 minutes but after a short nap and some lucy he was ready to enjoy the rest of the day. We had lunch and went for a stroll along the pier. The kids went on some fairground rides and then had fun with the 2p falls in the amusement arcade.

Again, it's all about the selfies this month. They aren't perfect but then that's just us.

#MeAndMine - A Family Portrait (April 2014)

I've reverted back to a very quick iPhone selfie for this months photo.

As you will notice, I haven't been about this month. MC only went back to school after the Easter holidays on Monday and the week before that we all had a tummy bug.

I've spent most of the month - tummy bug aside - just enjoying 'real life' (and the glorious warm weather that April brought us) but I've enjoyed it that much I haven't thought to take any complete family photos. It's a shame as we've had trips out to the sea, trips to the zoo, trips to the park and trips to see family and friends. I've taken lots of photos but none of the four of us.

Big fail.

My homework for May is to try and get at least three photos. I'm sure we will be able to do it. We are away for the May half-term at the end of the month too and ending it at the Baby Tilda Barn Dance! I also have some extremely exciting news that I'm holding back on at the moment too.

So, anyway, this photo was grabbed last night. The kids insisted on pulling silly faces. They'd spent most of the afternoon, after MC got home from school, bouncing on the bouncy castle in the back garden. They were tired but full of fresh air and happiness. It also resulted in a 6.30pm bedtime so Matt and I were pretty happy too!

#MeAndMine - A Family Portrait (March 2014)

March is probably the busiest month of the year for our family.

Both children were born in the month.

MC on the 11th (she was 5) and TC on the 28th (he was 2).

Throw in Mother's Day, a themed Minnie Mouse party and a few other prior engagements and I'm ending the month feeling pretty exhausted... but full of love and happiness.

I have been taking a lot more photographs of the children with the 'big camera' this year but it's very rare that I'm in the photos. Setting up the timer can be a bit hit and miss and the kids get easily distracted but asking other people to take photographs is probably worse - especially when it's my mother-in-law. She's good at a lot of things but sadly she's no photographer (not that I am but you know what I mean).

The day before Mother's Day we met up with my in-laws at Trentham Gardens. It was a lovely warm but slightly breezy day. Lots of scooting, fun, laughter, bickering (Matt and his mum - not the kids!) and ending with drinks and ice cream. I only have one half decent photo of the 4 of us that my MIL took that I'm including this month but I have lots of quite nice photos that I took of the kids enjoying themselves.

This month has been all about them so I wanted to share them with you (even if MC had fallen over 2 days earlier and is sporting a huge graze/bruise on her forehead!).

*Sports the voice of a newscaster about to mention that funny bit at the end of a broadcast*

And finally…

After MC's Minnie Mouse theme party earlier in the month we did have this photo taken - I wanted to share it because even though I'm exhausted on it, I couldn't stop laughing at Matt and TC sporting exactly the same expression. Priceless!

Happy 2nd Birthday Little Man

He's 2 today.

I can't believe it.

Doesn't seem right calling him Tiny Ched anymore. He's really growing into a proper little boy.

He loves cars, trucks, diggers, trains, helicopters and aeroplanes. He also has a fondness for One Direction!

He adores his Micro Scooter and has done for the past year. Everyone who sees him whizz past always comments on how he looks too little to be able to scoot so well.

I'm hoping he has the same passion for the first bike we've bought him for today.

His speech is coming on in leaps and bounds and despite being a strong-minded little boy he is the cutest, funniest and most loving little boy we could ask for.

Here's to the coming year. I just hope it goes slow as I don't want to give up my baby boy just yet.

Happy Birthday TC. Mummy and Daddy love you so so much xx

28th March 2012

28th March 2013

28th March 2014

Christmas Day 2013

In my 3 years of blogging I've not actually written about Christmas.

How bad is that?

To be honest, by time we are through the holidays and we plunge straight into a new year I feel like it's too late to blog about it.

This year though, I'm making an effort, despite us already being halfway through January.

I need to blog about our family life more. I need to spend more time detailing our life and treasuring memories. It's probably not a post that will interest many people but it's one that I can look back on and that's what matters to me most.

For the past 7 years I've cooked Christmas dinner. The least amount was for just Matt and myself (the Christmas before MC was born) and the most was for 10 people.

That was this Christmas. 10 people.

Each year I've stressed about Christmas. I've got worked up about cooking for everyone and making sure the meal is perfect.

It always has been.

I'd spend the few days before working out all my timings of what needed to go in the oven on what setting, at what time and for how long. It would be timed to the minute and written out neatly in order.

This year was different though. I didn't prepare timings in advance and stress about dinner being perfect. Over the last 11 months or so, since Tilda passed away, I've realised more than ever what's important in life. Just being together as a family is what matters. Christmas dinner and everything else are just the extras. I had plenty of stars around the house to remind me of Tilda and what was important - not that I need reminding.

We were looking forward to Christmas as it was the first in our lovely new home. We were to be joined for dinner by my parents, Matt's parents and his brother and fiancée.

Christmas day was lovely.

The kids woke about 8am and that was only because I started making noise as I'd been wide awake from 6.30am excited to see the kids open their presents. Mini Cheddar was so excited when she saw the stocking filled at the end of her bed.

"SANTA'S BEEN" came the cries and running along the landing.

I when to Tiny Ched's room, plucked him from his cot and carried him into our room. MC carried his stocking in and we all sat on our bed to open presents. TC loved every second of it. He opened every present, although it took him a while as when he discovered Percy the engine in there he was beside himself and just wanted to play with that.

We went downstairs to the kitchen for breakfast and then we entered the lounge to discover more presents - the kids had definitely been good this year!

Again, TC opened every single present excitedly and when he discovered Thomas the Tank Engine, that was it! He shrieked.

Last Christmas I would have been champing at the bit to get through the present opening and so I could start dinner. This year though, I soaked it all in. I took lots of photos and watched the kids excitement unfold on their faces. It was lovely and leisurely.

We all got dressed and the kids played happily with their new toys whilst Matt and I started the dinner prep. Matt is the perfect Christmas dinner sous chef! He preps the mountains of vegetables (I hate prepping sprouts) and cleans all the pots up as we go and is just generally my 'kitchen biatch' for the day. It's very rare we both cook together and I love it.

Matt's parents arrived just after 11am, after driving up from Nottingham, and his brother and fiancée arrived shortly after from Oxford. My parents (who only live 10 minutes away) arrived too and we were all set. I'd told everyone that I'd serve dinner at 1pm and, for the first time ever, it was slightly late by about 15 minutes - probably due to my more relaxed attitude!

We sat down (at a table with 3 extra non-matching chairs - isn't that what Christmas is all about?) to eat a feast of roast beef (we aren't huge fans of turkey), a mountain of roast potatoes, stuffing (who says you can't have it with beef?), pigs in blankets, roasted parsnips, sprouts and pancetta, carrots, broccoli and gravy. It was delicious and my stomach is growling just thinking about it.

For dessert I'd made a chocolate hazelnut meringue roulade the day before (thanks Delia!). If you've not tried one, do it - simple to make and it's a bit like eating Fererro Rocher. We had Christmas pudding and homemade mince pies too.

After dinner began the present opening again! The kids were spoilt so much and, despite having a big house now, we were wondering where we were going to put it all.

The only time the TV was on all day was for the Queen's Speech. Usually we will watch a film or something but this year I wanted proper family time with no distractions. We talked, we played games and we were just happy in each others company. There was lots of laughter and just being together as a family.

TC did so well through the day. He had a couple of small naps and went to bed a little later than usual without a peep from him. MC stayed up late and was a little tearful at bedtime due to such a busy and exciting day.

The inlaws all stayed overnight and it was lovely to be able to put everyone up for the night now we have the extra bedrooms.

Everyone went home mid-morning on Boxing Day so we could enjoy the rest of Christmas as a family of four and we did just that.

I have so many lovely memories.

TC opening up his stocking presents on our bed

MC thrilled to have Harry Styles!

This Disney Hedbanz game provided
much entertainment Christmas Day 

Full steam opening presents

"What's that you've got bro?"

The kids playing happily while we cooked dinner

My kitchen biatch hard at work

Note the Matilda Mae star at the end

Enjoying roulade and ice cream

Christmas Dinner face

A helping hand with presents from Grandma and Grandad

So good at opening presents

They played beautifully together with toys

Or just playing horses

Disney Hedbandz is awesome

My favourite photo from Christmas