Thursday, 2 May 2013

2nd May - Tilda's Day

It's just a date, right?

Well, yes it is, of course.

But this is a date that will be in many people's hearts and minds for the rest of their lives.

A date when an amazing mother and father should have been celebrating the 1st birthday of their beautiful baby girl, Matilda Mae.

It's not right.

It's not fair.

I've been struggling all week. Not knowing what to write. My heart is heavy and my mind can't concentrate.

I have a book that I write in each day that my best friend bought me. It's a five year book that asks a question each day, so you can compare your answers over 5 years. A couple of weeks back the words read something like "I wish I could stop ____________ from happening".

I wrote 'cot death'.

I don't think my answer will change, even by 2018.

As I look at Tiny Ched, I think of Tilda and everything she should be. Everything that Jennie and David have lost.

2nd May will be a date, just like 2nd February and 7th March that will live with me forever.

Pink angel slices for a sweet angel
I've made plans for today. Plans to celebrate Matilda's short life and honour her birthday in some small way. I'm meeting Susanne and Lisa with our children for a picnic in the park. We are meeting where we will be walking a mile in memory of Matilda in less than two weeks.

We are going to blow bubbles and enjoy pink treats. I'm also dressing myself and the kids in pink and purple.

There will be lots of tears (I have invested in a multipack of tissues) but there will be happiness too. Susanne and I have a unique bond from our journey to Tilda's funeral and back and I know, when I see her tomorrow, all those memories will come flooding back.

We will, as we have done everyday, think of David, Jennie and Matilda Mae.

Then tonight, as the sun sets on 2nd May, I will be lighting a candle for Matilda as her parents say goodbye to their precious little girl in a way that Jennie describes so beautifully.

It's something no parent should have to do and I hope they somehow find the strength to get through it.

It's not just a date. It's a remembrance and a celebration.

Of a short life.

Of a life of love and beauty.

It's also a time to reflect.

Of what could have been.

Of what should have been.

2nd May.

A date that will never be forgotten.

Tilda's day.

Happy 1st Birthday in the sky sweet angel xx

I've blogged before about an auction taking place in memory of Matilda Mae. This auction will be running from 11th May - 20th May 2013 with all proceeds going to The Lullaby Trust (formerly FSID).  They help support families, like Jennie's, who have experienced the loss of a baby from sudden infant death syndrome. 

There is an ever growing list of generous people and companies who have donated to the auction and full details of everything available will be online soon. Please help support the auction in any way you can by bidding, tweeting, posting on Facebook, emailing etc. Get the word out there!

If you require any further information, you can contact Jennie or Susanne.

This post was written as part of a blog hop for Matilda's 1st Birthday. You can view the other entries here:


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Katie @mummydaddyme said...

What you are doing for Jennie and Matila Mae is wonderful Heather. Jennie is very lucky to have you. We are going to blow some bubbles for Matilda Mae today. Jennie is never far from my thoughts. Xx

Stephanie Arsoska said...

What a lovely way to honour the day. I am glad you will be together.

Eclectic Mum said...

A beautiful way to honour Matilda Mae. Such a sad thing. I cannot even beging to imagine the pain these parents feel xxxxx

Stay At Home Mum ~ In Training said...

I think it's lovely that so many people are supporting Jennie. We are going to blow bubbles for Matilda Mae this afternoon. I don't know Jennie but I think of her and Matilda Mae everyday. Xxx

Lisa said...

Looking forward to seeing you later and blow some bubble kisses x

Susanne Remic said...

Beautiful words Heather. I know that I am going to be in floods of tears when I see you. I can't think of anyone else I would want to spend today with. xxxxxx

Coombe Mill (Fiona) said...

It is too tragic for words, but the support here I know will mean so much. Beautiful post. Popping over from the blog hop.

Helen Braid said...

It is the cruelest, cruelest thing. I will never forget Jennie and Matilda and I will never in a million years make sense of it either. Beautiful words and I hope your day at the park brought some smiles xx

TheHandmadeMum said...

What lovely words. I hope the picnic for Matilda was a nice way to remember her. It really is the cruelest thing x

Baked Potato Mummy said...

Such lovely words Heather. I hope the picnic was as perfect as it sounded.
2nd May will forever be a day for remembrance and reflection for so many people x

familyfourfun said...

Beautiful words - I really hope they find the strength too - hope you had a lovely day for them. Xx

Monika MumontheBrink said...

So beautifully expressed! The 2nd of May usually falls just before busy Bank holiday weekend. It is a perfect date now and in years to come to refocus on what really matters- family and friends who are there for us, be that near or far.

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What a lovely way to 'honour' the day

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jennie said...

Tilda's Day - I think we might call it that from now on. And you are right a day of reflection but also a day to look forward and make promises and focus on family. Thank you for being such a lovely friend, I am glad that you and Susanne could be together. I will never be able to thank you both enough for coming to Tilda's goodbye and talking so bravely. I am so sorry that you never got to meet Tilda I know you would have adored her. I miss her so so much and Thursday was so so hard but I will never forget the love and support from my friends on this day. Tilda's Day. Thank you x

Sara Murray said...

A beautiful post and a wonderful way to spend the day remembering Matilda Mae xx

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