#MeAndMine - A Family Portrait (June 2014)

Straight off I have a confession to make.

These photos were taken May 31st.

But, because they were taken after my May post, I'm hoping Lucy will let me off as I really wanted to share them on the blog.

We were lucky enough to go to the Matilda Mae Barn Dance in Kent. It's the reason we chose to spend our half-term break in Camber so we would be in the area for the barn dance. I knew I couldn't miss it and I'm glad I didn't.

The weather was perfect and Jennie, Ami from Beebies Baby Store (who has just won Best Independent Retailer in the Loved By Parents Awards!) and everyone else involved in the organisation of the event made it a wonderful day.

I have to admit that it was hard-going. After a week of holidaying with two small children, and three out of the four of us being ill when we were away, Matt and I were exhausted. We still had such a lovely time. It was so lovely to catch up with friends old and new whilst raising money for The Lullaby Trust.

These photos were taken in the virtual photo booth.

TC wasn't too keen at first but he never fails to delight in being turned upside down. The kids love these photos as much as I do and I often find them picking it up and giggling at them. I think it's the sight of daddy in a turkey hat! MC also says my wig looks like Harry Styles. Hmm.

They are ones we will treasure forever and that's why I knew they had to be part of my Me and Mine post this month.

In other news, I've decided to revamp and relaunch my blog in September/October. I've let my blog completely slide over the last year and that makes me sad. I started the blog as my online diary - a place to capture my life as a stay-at-home-mum, a place that I could look back on and a place that my children could read about their lives when they are older. The fact that the last year has been sketchy, missing out on so many special moments makes me want to try and get back what I once had. I haven't been myself this past year and things have changed. Also, TC starts at play school at the end of September so it should free up some time during the day. 

I have some special photos to share with you all very soon too! 

Watch this space...

Being Me

You know when you see someone on social media raving about a new fitness routine or a new diet that is making them feel great?

You know when you read it and you just want to reach through the screen and slap the person who posted?

Yeah...well...erm...prepare to slap me!

I'm feeling quite good right now.

I actually 'like' being me.

I'm still a long way from loving my body but I feel happier already.

I've never been overweight. I'm lucky like that. In fact, I used to get teased for being 'skinny' when I was younger. But I hate my legs with a passion. You will very rarely see me in skirts or shorts above the knee. I just feel like my thighs are MAHOOSIVE. I know deep down they aren't really. Not that bad anyway but it's just this thing I have. You know? I think everybody has a part of themselves they really hate or dislike. Also, since breast-feeding two children, I've lost my boobs somewhere along the line so this only puts the emphasis on my bottom-half. Padded bras are my friends at the moment. Boob job anyone?

Anyway, before I ramble on anymore I need to get all this out there on my blog. I don't know why. I just do. I hope that my kids will read this blog when I'm older.

This worries me though.

It worries me because I don't what them to be embarrassed about their bodies. But at the same time I want them to be able to realise they need to take care of their bodies too. At the moment, their diets are shocking. If MC could eat pasta every single day, she would. If TC could eat sausages and breadsticks every day, he would. MC will eat fruit but the only vegetable I can manage to get into her (under duress) is broccoli. TC, on the other hand, is refusing to eat fruit and veg. He's not long turned 2 so I can't reason with him yet. I can get soup into him so this has become my vegetable arsenal. It's so difficult though.

Again, I digress.

What did I want to say again?

Oh right. Yes.

I'll be the first to admit that I spent last year in a bit of a fog. Friends of mine suffered major tragedies and instead of grasping hold of life and making the moments count, I spent a lot of last year feeling a bit 'meh'. My diet was poor and exercise non-existent. I lacked energy and illness seemed to catch me at every opportunity.

Sure, we holidayed in Florida again, which was great, but I wouldn't say it did my diet any favours!

We moved house which didn't help my diet or stress levels.

Then serious food poisoning wiped most of September out (and October out thanks to a relapse).

The weight I lost during the food poisoning was piled back on (and then some) over the Christmas holidays.

As 2014 hit I wanted to make a change but didn't know how to get motivated. Then, in April, it suddenly hit me that I was turning 40 in six months time.

What was I doing?

Some days I'd hit a wall just after lunch and my body would give in to a nap as TC slept. I'd wake up for the school run feeling groggy and moody. I would be a bit snappy with the kids for no real reason.

They were making noise.

They were constantly asking me questions.

They were being silly.

They are kids, that's what kids do! I shouldn't be feeling like this.

Did I really want my kids to remember me as a bit grumpy?

So, since early April I've really made an effort. I've embraced a healthier lifestyle and I am loving it. I'm exercising everyday thanks to Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred. I've cut out carbs pretty much completely (for someone who lived on bread, rice, pasta and potatoes this is HUGE!) and am trying my best to eat paleo style food as best I can. I've also upped my water intake massively. Previously I'd get to the evening and realise I'd only had one coffee all day.

The change has had a huge impact on me.

I feel pretty good.

My body shape is changing. I'm leaner. I'm fitter.

But best of all?

I just FEEL healthy.

I have more energy. I'm not feeling like I need a nap. I'm sleeping better each night.

You definitely are what you eat.

I'm not saying I don't have the occasional treat...because I do. I'm not saying I have given up alcohol...because I'm not stupid.

People have started to notice over the past couple of weeks. Not everyone. But then I wouldn't expect them to. A couple of friends, my mother-in-law and my hairdresser. Just little comments about weight loss or complexion looking better. It all helps my confidence.

I have a number of lovely friends to thank for their support (you know who you are) in helping me with meal ideas and motivation.

The fog of 2013 has officially lifted.

I'm embracing life and I'm embracing healthy eating.

I'm happy being me.