Thursday, 27 October 2011

"My Child Mastered The Potty In A Day" - Oh Feck Off!

Looks so easy doesn't it?
Today has been a somewhat distressing day in our household.

For those of you who don't know, I started properly toilet training Mini Cheddar on Monday so we are now on day 4. It all started out so well with 2 great successes Monday (even a poo!) and another one Tuesday...yesterday we had nothing and today was just a constant battle.

I've tried toilet training her a couple of months ago but she was a bit constipated so I stopped.

This week was going to be different. No constipation. No play school (half term). No engagements. Just me, my daughter and the potty.

I thought training her would be a doddle, she knows when she's going, she knows she needs to do her "wee wee's and poo poo's" on the potty, she has great communication and she's intelligent.

I was so naive.

After the successes earlier this week, MC has now resorted to jumping up and down getting all stressed and shouting "Mummy! Mummy!" when she wants to go. I tell her it's time to get the potty out and she starts getting upset. She eventually sits on it for 5 minutes, says she doesn't need a wee wee anymore, pulls her pants up and then urinates. Everywhere.

It's so hard to try and not get frustrated.

"Maybe there's a 'potty whisperer' we can pay to come and help us" my husband jokes this evening as he looks at how knackered I am.

"Haha, yeah maybe" I fake laugh "Be back in a minute".

Obviously I jump straight on the laptop. Hey, don't judge me - desperate times call for desperate measures and all that! Besides, I'm sure I've heard the term 'potty whisperer'* used before. I think I'd pay £1000 right now to get someone in to train MC, that's how bad today has been.

Thanks for those of you who offered your support on Twitter earlier today when I sent out a tearful tweet (Husband had taken MC to the post office for 10 minutes so I could have a frustrated, knackered cry to myself). So glad none of you tweeted back how your child picked it up in a day. I had that last month and I wanted to scream in the persons face! Think they are the same breed of person who tell you how their 2 week old sleeps through 12 hours a night when your 1 year old has you up every few hours.

If you have any pearls of wisdom then I'd love to hear them, if you're one of those people above then move along...nothing to see here!

Here's to the on-going potty saga.

It wouldn't be so bad if I could have a few glasses of wine at night to ease the pain. Guess I'll just have to slope off and weep into a glass of orange juice. Remind me again why I'm having another baby?

*The potty whisperer is a technique that you start on newborns by making a "pssss" noise in their ears when you want them to 'go'. My Sister who has travelled to some pretty remote places in the world says they use it in places they don't have nappies for their children.


Di said...

Awww it is frustrating for all parents and those who say it isn't are talking a load of excuse my language bullshit. The trick is to stick at it and just be firm, it doesn't mean you have to shout as could scare her but she will get their with plenty of patience but I have heard some people talking about potty training books one girl i know said she read one by gina ford i think it was i will go check now lol. Yeh it's gina ford thankfully she was on fb lol but good luck and dont give up xx

PhotoPuddle said...

The best advice I can give you is to just wait until she's really ready. We had a couple of false starts with my daughter so we just put the nappies back on and waited a little while longer. Once she was really ready though she cracked pretty easily. Perhaps I was lucky and that's crap advice you don't want to hear. Or failing that bribery! Offer her a treat (like a sticker or little sweetie) when she successfully uses the potty and then over time it'll come naturally and the treats can stop.

HonieBuk said...

I thought the wee's were hard and then came the poo's, lol
It's not easy, I'm not going to pretend it is (unlike the ladies in the playground who's children where potty trained before they could walk, yeh right!)

The best advice I can give is to be prepared and if you are not ready or haven't got a lot of time (and masses of focus) on your hands right now - now is perhaps not the right time. It's not just your child that has to be ready!

First up - when you do start, stick to your guns. Going backwards and forwards or reverting back to nappies is confusing. I did buy pull-ups - but I'm glad I didn't use them (I guess it is just a bit too confusing to expect them to do something new and then stick what feels exactly like a god damn nappy on them).

Secondly, carry a spare set of clothes with you right now (particularly knickers) and a few nappy bags for the soiled ones :o

Lastly, I didn't think of this, a friend did it (and says it made it much easier): invest in a porta potty - one that folds down to next to nothing and you can put liners in (easier to empty them). Be prepared to use it 'anywhere'.

Good Luck

NotMyYearOff said...

It doesn't sound one bit easy! My mum is trying to potty train my niece and so far she is just using up all the hand wash and not going on the loo. She is fully aware of when she wants to go but doesn't want to go anywhere except in her nappy.
I'm not really looking forward to that bit with my LO!
Sending you good potty wishes!

mid30slife said...

I'm just writing to sympathise.  All children are so different, I think very unpredictable when it comes to potty training.  Our son took the best part of a year, he had filled every sticker chart known to man but it still took ages for it all to click.  He was in night nappies for another 1.5 years after that.  

I was expecting the worst with my daughter, who somehow did it easily in 3 days - I'm not sure how that happened.  I like to think it was karma after our boy.  What I'm trying to say is there is little rhyme or reason, I did nothing different the 2 times with very different outcomes.  I think it has a lot to do with luck, which I hope improves for you very soon. xxxx

Mummyandthebeastie said...

I want some help too! I am thinking of properly starting in the next few days (as I have some more free time) but I know it's going to be a nightmare. Beastie knows full well what it going on but he just simply will not perform in the potty or loo! I need the patient of a saint...I realise this. Also he is like MC, will not want to go anymore then the moment I put pants on he wees everywhere xx

Jazzy said...

Oh, all of a sudden, in her own good time, your MC will just 'get it'. Never mind those who 'say' their kid trained in one day. They're lying..... or exagerrating!! Good luck..

xx Jazzy

Emma said...

Awww, bless you. I think at some point they just 'get' it, but maybe not before your carpets are ruined :-) Little S has been 'trained' for a few months, but still has a lot of accidents, usually stood next to the toilet. 
I found bribery worked quite well. Good luck with it. xx

Lady Estrogen said...

I cannot offer any advice, as I'm just beginning it myself... with 2. YEAH.
Effing good times, babe!

janine atkin said...

i found lots of over the top clapping and cheering did the trick, (once theyve finished doing a pee pee!!)

Mama Syder said...

Having two of each I found the girls a nightmare to potty train and neither of them would ever use the potty. Have you tried her straight on the toilet? Sometimes they are more prepared to try it if they know its what mummy does. Get one of those little toilet stools so she can climb up herself and practise sitting on it. Even let her see you sitting on the loo and make it look fun so it encourages her to try it too. It took mine a couple of weeks of sitting on the loo before they would actually pee and in the meantime stick some pull ups on her.

Just relax...she will pick it up in her own time x

workinglondonmummy said...

oh it is such a rough time. My sister went through the same and I am debating when to start with my little one. I agree with Mama Syder though about trying on the toilet since todllers are so into copying us. will keep fingers crossed for you xx

Mari said...

I'm a bit late on this one but come on - you must remember my posts this summer? anyway I got to almost giving up as I wasn't getting ANYWHERE, tears (mine) tantrums (mine again) and I didn't know what to do.
Me and OH took to shouting out 'Oh, I've got a wee wee coming!' and all four of us would traipse off to the loo and do our business in front of everyone. a lot of looking down the pan, oohs and ahhs and flushing chain, washing hands etc. It started to work and within a few days we'd almost totally cracked it.
We have the very odd mistake still but there's usually a reason for it.
good luck - You will get there, I promise xxx

Looking for Blue Sky said...

My eldest and youngest trained fairly easily with at least one false start. Smiley of course will never be fully trained, but she would like to be! The only advice I heard that I don't see here is to not dress the child fully so while she's training he hasn't got to be pulling at clothes but can just go and sit on the potty when she's ready. And of course not to let her know you're stressing about it. And yes I know how hard that is!

SAHMlovingit said...

Thanks for commenting.  I've just had her in knickers and a vest (with the heating on in the house).  She will sit on the potty fine but when she feels the sensation she needs to go she freaks out and starts jumping up and down = wee everywhere :( x

SAHMlovingit said...

I can't even begin to imagine what it must have been like training twins Mari so I should just shut up and stop complaining.  It's so difficult sometimes trying to hide your frustrations isn't it? xxx

SAHMlovingit said...

She does sit on the toilet too - we give her the option of both as they just have a toilet at play school. I'm sure we will get there soon, it's just sooooo hard xx

SAHMlovingit said...

I think the key word in your comment is 'relax'. I have backed off the past few days, let her wear pull-ups if she wants.  As for the toilet, she has the option of both...we did that because she started play school in Sept and they only have a toilet there - no potty. We are always taking her to the toilet with us, I've also bought her some 'potty' story books and I'm hoping in time it will just all click into place. Thank you for your help Mama S xx

SAHMlovingit said...

We do all that but to no avail... I know we will get there eventually, it will just take time x

SAHMlovingit said...

You have my sympathies...I don't think I would have the patience to potty train twins. Good luck ho!

SAHMlovingit said...

Yup, my lounge carpet already stinks of wee, despite constant cleaning. Doesn't help being pregnant and having a highly over sensitive nose! Thanks for the comment Emma, I'm sure it will all click into place soon xx

SAHMlovingit said...

Thanks Jazzy :) I've backed off with her and am just going to let her get it in her own time. Wise words my dear xx

SAHMlovingit said...

How's it going?  I've backed off with MC or I'll get myself too stressed out.  I'm sure it will all just click with her one day. Good luck too xx

SAHMlovingit said...

Thanks :) It's good to know others have had similar problems. I'm sure MC will just click in time, I've backed off and am being far more relaxed about it all which I think is helping. Fingers crossed! xx

SAHMlovingit said...

Thanks hun. She will sit on the potty fine but when she feels the sensation that she needs to go she freaks out and starts jumping up and down.  All good fun...not!

SAHMlovingit said...

Thanks for commenting :)  

We have pull-ups which she's been using before we properly started and I sooooooo wish we hadn't ever bothered with them. She seems to be fine having a wee in them but in knickers she freaks out whenever she feels the sensation she's going to wee. We have a porta potty - she's sat on it a few times when we've been out but not actually done anything in it yet.

SAHMlovingit said...

I think that's the key...just wait until she's ready. I've backed off for a bit for now.

We do the bribery thing but it doesn't really work :(

SAHMlovingit said...

Thanks Di.

I have backed off her for a bit as she was just getting stressed and upset about it (and I was too).  We still talk about the potty and she still sits on it taking her knickers or pull-ups down, she will happily sit on it saying she needs a wee or a poo but won't actually do the deed!  

It will come eventually, I'm sure. xx

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