Knowing people who have been - let's just say well and truly 'blessed' in that area - complain of backache or getting unwanted male attention, I've been grateful that I was given what I was.
I breastfed my daughter, Mini Cheddar, and stopped gradually over a few weeks. My boobs stayed in a relatively good condition and size afterwards. With Tiny Ched though, I stopped abruptly. For two weeks I went around looking like Katie Price - albeit a bit less cheery and not wanting anyone to come within 2 feet of my norks for fear of the excruciating pain!
I got through it though.
But what have I been left with?
Not much.
Seriously, I think there is a Tit Fairy who came along and grabbed my reasonable breasts and replaced them with two small bags of flour overnight.
WHO STOLE MY BANGERS?
I'm starting to think I'm being punished for quitting breastfeeding, even though it wasn't really my choice *shakes fist at mastitis again*.
What would happen if we had any more children?
Would by chest become inverted?
So, if you're reading my blog Santa...can you please make sure there's a Wonderbra in my stocking this year so people don't start thinking I'm a boy.
I'm just glad Matt didn't marry me for my boobs!
All joking aside though, the disappearance of my norks is totally worth it because of this little dude...
He took my heart and now, it seems, he's taken my breasticles.
Yes, he's worth every cup size.